This past week, Shannon put onto a blog by a woman (girl actually) who, at 31 had her second child. The child has Down's. For those of us who work in special education, we know that having a child with Down's is not the end of the world. In fact, Down's children are generally the angels on Earth. Seeing them smile, makes my day. I can make a smile last for over a week and through the worst of behaviors. Just give me a smile!!

But that made me think...why do some of us get through bad times while others of us get pulled down into the depths of despair? Why do some of us weather those bad times and come out on the other side all right while others of us never recover from it? And at what point do some of us realize that the "bad times" were not really so bad after all?

In thinking about my own experiences and those of my friends and family, I have decided the key is whether we feel sorry for ourselves or not. If we have a sense of entitlement the This-should-not-be-happening-to-me feeling, then we are more likely to suffer through this 'bad time" worse for the wear. We let this experience bog us down, keep us up at night, and all in all impact our everyday life. We begin to see this as a something that will go on for our lifetime rather than realizing that it might be only for the moment.

For those of us who see this bad experience as "momentary", we are more likely to get through it much better. It may keep us awake one or two nights, it might bog us down for a week or so and it might impact our life in a temporary way, but we know it will all be "better in the morning". We look for the "good" in the day cuz we simply cannot take any more "bad". And in looking for the "good" we start to see more good than we expected to see. The child's smile, the beautiful sky, the unexpected interaction with a good friend....all add together to make our day "good". Very seldom is it a BIG thing that makes our day good; rather it is the culmination of many small things.

Certainly, there are lifetime events that don't go away in the morning. Having a baby with Down's or having a stroke or being in an accident that changes who you are and the things you are able to do. None of those things are "momentary". They are life changing events. But I think the philosophy is still the same. Rather than wallow in the "bad", you start to look for the "good". You see the smile of your baby and the recognition that you are important to him/her past being a feeding machine, you make small progressive steps in your life that make you more independent and you redefine who you are and what you can do and then you see all of that as "Good". Suddenly, the bad is not so bad and then the bad is easier to live with and then the bad is all behind you.

I pray that no matter what happens in my life that I am able to always find the good in my day. Talking to Shannon or Michael is good. Watching Alyssa play, sing, dance, talk, walk, laugh, grow is very good in my day. Doing a good job at work is good in my day. Spending time with my husband and appreciating him for who he is is "good" in my day. Yes, I have had bad times. I have been curled on the floor sobbing as if there was no hope for tomorrow. But somehow or another, I have been able to lift my head after a period of time and start looking for the good. I want to always be that way. May I never get lost in that "feel sorry for me" world. That is NOT who I want to be or how I want people to remember me.

Just my thoughts for today!!